Sunday, October 10, 2010

Conversations with My Father - Pt. 7

Now I think he's messing with me.

Dad:  Hey, will you make me a Facebook?
Me:  What?  Why?  You don't have a computer.
Dad:  I know, but you could give me updates from people and then tell them what I'm up to.
Me:  . . .
Dad:  Everyone keeps asking me if I have a Facebook and I tell them I don't, but that you do, so they said you could make me one.
Me:  Well, that's true, I COULD make you one, but you wouldn't be able to use it because you don't have a computer.
Dad:  I KNOW, LAINEY, but YOU have a computer.
Me:  I don't understand.  Do you want me to bring my computer over?
Dad:  *sigh*  No.  I want you to make me a Facebook.
Me: . . .
Dad:  Just make me a Facebook and then tell me what people say.
Me:  WHAT PEOPLE?  I can't just MAKE you a Facebook and people will magically appear!
Dad:  Yes, they will.  They'll see that I have a Facebook and then they'll friend me.
Me:  Do you even know what "friend me" means?
Dad:  Yes, Lainey, I'm not retarded.  They'll be on my friends list and I can see what they're doing.
Me:  But YOU won't be able to see what they're doing, because you don't have a computer!
Dad:  But YOU do!
Me: I swear to god, I'm gonna' punch whoever told you to get on Facebook.  Just CALL people if you want to know what they're up to.
Dad:  That's SO 2005


jM said...


Pinky McLadybits said...


Anonymous said...

oh dear lord.

Lainey said...

jM - I've been tempted to make one for him, as a joke, but it reeks of effort. If I do, you'll be his first friend!

Pinky - OBVS.

gp - I know.

And for what it's worth, I've offered to bring my computer over to show him how to look up things on Google, offered to show him how to do his banking online, offered to show him how to look up old friends on Facebook and MySpace and every time he says, "Nah, I don't want to. I don't care. Just tell me if I get an email." Alrighty then...

Girl With Curious Hair said...

I too would like to friend Denny Bobainey. I'm sure he would love to know what I'm up to once you tell him.

Nicolae said...

I have no idea what to say other than best of luck with this. Hey, maybe you'll get a tv show out of it like that Shit My Dad Says guy! Or even a book! Nevermind, that would be more work. Just good luck.

Blonde Savant said...

I would be Denny's friend IN A HEARTBEART.

That said, maintaining a Dennybook would be exhausting and I in no way expect you to do so. But man it would be great.

ahamos said...

But think of the status updates! "Off to find more sadness glasses for my shnooky-wookums!" or "check out my new video! c:\documents and settings\denny\desktop\video.asf"

Lainey said...

If I get super bored and make a Dennybook one day, YOU people better remember that you asked for it!