Wednesday, April 22, 2009

FREEDOM TASTES LIKE AMERICA!! And a little like gin.

First of all - I freakin' love all of you nutty nuts!

Second - I stole the title of this entry from Anna von Beaverplatz. Thank you, AvB for being awesome and kind of a drunk.

Third - it is ON, bitches!

Jackie and I are fighting over the FREEDOM MUG now, so we decided we should have some type of competition and the winner would get the cup. Our boss suggested we write an essay on "What Freedom Means To Me" because she is LAME and a nerd and apparently thinks we're 9 and she's our teacher. After Jackie and I both crushed her spirit with our withering looks, we decided that whoever is the biggest douche (without being a truly rotten person) wins the coveted cup.

Jackie made the first move. On her way out, while I was stuck on a conference call, she stopped in my office & sang the "B is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S" song, thereby infecting me with a most heinous earworm. Evil!

Jackie - 1
Lainey - 0

Help me, evil geniuses - I need ideas for pummeling her. I WANT THAT CUP!


Anna von Beaverplatz said...

I am apparently not evil enough. I am terrible at being a douche. It's true! Just ask pseudo-Mr. AvB.

I am, however, super excited to see a photo of the amazing and infamous FREEDOM MUG. I think I need one too! I kind of want to head to the local Army recruiting station and steal one. And then write FREEDOM MUG on it in white-out. Jackie is awesome.

P.S. You're welcome. I am glad you are amused by my alcoholism. And my awesomeness. B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

Girl With Curious Hair said...

I am so proud to have inspired the Mug of Destiny.

How about a nice little jig while she's trying to keep a straight face or be dignified? Preferably if there are hot liquids being consumed.

cindy said...

How about next time she's away from her office you put post-it notes all over her desk/area marking everything "Freedom this or that"? Like her "Freedom Pen", "Freedom Mouse" "Door to Freedom", etc.

I don't know if that's douch-ey or stupid?

Also, I'm proposing the inmates take over Pajiba today with song lyrics day. Come over!

Sofi said...

Well, if you're taking the douche thing seriously I'd make sure there are a lot of people around. First, I'd sniff loudly, and then say: "Eeeww, is that you? Did you forget to douche this morning or something?"

Anyway, that's what I'd do.

Lainey said...

AvB - You're the awesoMOST! And very pretty! If you steal yourself a FREEDOM mug, I will probably try to kiss you.

Girl - I'm afraid if I tried to do a jig, I would be the one cracking up. Or injuring myself. Which actually, would probably crack her up.

Cindy - I LOVE that! I'm off tomorrow, but I'm going to do it on Monday. Thanks for starting a mini revolution, too, by the way. It amused the hell out of me!

Sofi - I may do something like that. She's super easy to embarrass AND she turns bright red which is a huge bonus! I have to keep it classy though. Just, you know, cuz I'm class-ay.

cindy said...

My revolution failed! But still, I did start one. Next time, THE WORLD.

Anna von Beaverplatz said...

Baby steps, cindy, baby steps.

(I just put another one in the veagns-v.-carnivores thread. Hee!)