Wednesday, October 7, 2009


So this really has nothing to do with No Whining Wednesday, but I don't have anything else to write about. Well, I DO have other things to write about, but they'll take effort and thought and editing and I'm just not feeling super excited about any of those words, so you'll get this. And you'll LIKE it.

The grocery store by my house employs "special" folks as, I'm sure, lots of grocery stores do. One of the gentlemen who works there is named Dan and Dan falls somewhere on the Autism spectrum. He talks a mile a minute to you as soon as you get to the register and he does it with a completely flat tone with no rises or falls. He doesn't laugh, he says, "HA HA". I have no idea how, but half of the times I'm at the store, I wind up in Dan's line.

So, the other day I'm standing in line checking out and Dan's rambling on and on and saying, "HA HA" after every 3rd sentence. I saw my boss's 17-year-old daughter run in. I said, "Hey, Debi, whatcha' doing?"

She stopped and said, "Oh hey! I'm running in to get money and then I have to go meet my mom. She's REALLY mad at me. Like REALLY mad!" I asked why. She said because she was getting her nose pierced and her mom was not happy.

I laughed and said, "DEBI - you are not! I'm telling your mother!"

Obviously, I'm kidding.

Not to Dan. Dan stopped ringing up my groceries, lowered his eyebrows, looked at me scornfully and said, slowly and clearly, "You shouldn't tattle. It's NOT nice."

Dan had nothing else to say to me for the remainder of our checkout time together.

Yeah, so my recollection of this fascinating story probably isn't nearly as amusing as it was at the time, but you guys, it was really funny. Seriously. HA HA!

Happy No Whining Wednesday!  Anything make you laugh recently?  


Eyvi Sprite said...

My sister is a Developmental Support Worker. Which is a fancy way of saying she helps people like your Dan out all the time. While in college, everyone learned all the ridiculous things the medical community has accepted as appropriate over the years where people such as this are concernced. At one point during my sisters college education I had called an inanimate object I was having a difficult time using correctly 'retarded'. My sister sucked breath in through her teeth so quickly it probably effected the barometer. She informed me how insensitive and ignorant I was to use that word. I tried to defend myself by pointing out I was talking about an object and not a person. Did no good. Needless to say, everyone uses the word as often and as inappropriately in my sisters presence as we can. I'm going to hell, I know, but it may be worth it; she just about has a coronary every time.

I would never use this word or anything equivelant around anyone it would insult. I understand that it is not an acceptable word. Nevermind that I just posted a story about it on the internet.

Anonymous said...

wow, lainey, you totally got schooled by a 'tard! awesome.

the whole HAHA thing reminds me of the speed racer skit on robot chicken (i think it does, i may be delusional.) regardless, i'll be doing it in my head all day today and out loud the next time i'm drinking.

cindy said...

Ha! That was perfect - you got scolded by your checkout boy.

I've gotten so used to checking out myself and packing my own groceries that I can't stand being in a line with a real person anymore.

Well, I'm laughing right now because my four-year old son just came in with a cardboard box house (my girls made) over his head, eyes peeking through a window and said "It's me!".

I must go play puzzles now.

Nicolae said...

Sometimes it helps to ask them if they're angry because their mother has told everyone what they like to do in their bedrooms and bathrooms. That usually gets some silence. Except the ones that talk a lot when embarrassed.